I have now been back in the United States, and in my home state of California for a little under 2 weeks. There is nothing like the familiarity of home: the windy road you drive up to get to your house, the way your home Safeway feels when you walk inside and know exactly where the milk is, and how perfect the weather is in your home town, hot and sunny during the day and then it cools off in the evening. You forget how much you miss home, when you have been gone for so long and it is only when you come back that you get to appreciate the beauty of the place you call home.
I loved my time in Scotland and that is a big reason of why I am going back, but I know leaving California again, and my family and friends for another year will be very difficult. I was talking to my Aunt Karen who lives in Minnesota and was visiting for the weekend and we were talking about how, for her, leaving California every time she visits is really difficult. She is sad every time no matter how many times in her life she has done it. But she says once she gets back to Minnesota and into her routine, she gets used to it and remembers why she loves Minnesota and her life and friends there. I think when you spend enough time in a place, just like with people, a little piece of your heart stays with it. I think that is why we are drawn back to people or places that mean something to us. And while reflecting back on my year, I can say a big part of my heart has been left in Glasgow.
I am currently reading a book called Being Human by Steve Chalke, and I would recommend it to everyone. It is about how to become the person you were meant to be and it was given to me by my site coordinator Lynn as a leaving present. It has been an extremely interesting book to read and many things have caused me to think about my life and my decisions and how I can apply what Steve says into my own life.
But one part that really stuck out to me as I was reading and reflecting on being home and my past year was a part about giving things away. Steve says, "Jesus taught us to behave as if nothing we give away could ever make us poorer, because we can never run out of what we give. Rather than trying to grip your life with tight, anxious hands, unclench that fist. Open your hand. Don't plot and scheme about tomorrow. Live with reckless generosity. Serve others. Give up the best seat. If you try to keep what you have, you'll lose even that. Give it away, and you'll get back more than you bargain for. Give it away, and you'll get back more than you ever dreamt you could get."
I believe this whole heartedly. The YAV program encouraged us to live simply and this allowed me to free myself of wanting or thinking I needed possessions, and material things, and the next cool gadget. My YAV year allowed me to give everything away, even parts of my heart, and it opened up this river inside of me that I hope is there forever. Constantly giving of myself, my talents, my feelings, my love, and constantly receiving more than I could ever dream of. I hope that in my future the people I work with continue to be touched by the love God has given me to give to others.
The book also talks about what success is and it says "that the ingredients to an organization becoming great is that it is led by someone who has the skill to blend extreme personal humility with intense professional will." I would like to believe that day by day I am growing into a person with extreme personal humility and that through my masters program starting in September, and more life experience and passion, I can gain an intense professional will and become the person I am meant to be.
Blessings,
Julie
